Time to Celebrate!

I passed!  I am so happy!  It was such a peaceful day the day prior and all leading up and through the meeting.  I seriously only got nervous for less than 2 minutes the whole time (and the mtg turned out to be 2 hrs!)  It was a miracle!  Normally I get so dehydrated and my heart races!  I knew it was the prayers, I was just so covered by them.  Thank you all so much!

My committee is so awesome!  I love them!  They were interested, and had brilliant ideas.  Their feedback was helpful.  They were not critical.  In fact, the main feedback I got was something I wanted to do and my advisor didn't want me to do-so I now I get to do it.  Basically, I wanted to put my opinion front and center.  He wanted me to be more fair and balanced.  Now that I can do it, I feel more genuine with my writing and even better about my project than before. 

The only thing that is a bummer is I need more data than I have.  The district has it, so it is just a matter of getting it from their system, but the district can be less than helpful.  I may have to wait until the principal's secretaries come back (they arrive first, but still they are gone already for another month or so). Not that I don't have plenty to keep me busy until then, reworking what I already wrote, but still...My committee and I are not sure I will get done by October (my previous goal), but it is still worth shooting for.  It's going to take a lot of focus and discpline!  I can't imagine doing this when the new one arrives, all sleep deprived and obvious priority shift, so hopefully I can make this work.  Other than that peace of information, it went better than I ever could have hoped for!

I was able to celebrate with my coworkers at lunch after, and then my mom and I got pedicures!  She surprised me with flowers and candy bars (I have such a sweet tooth!)  It was so nice of her!  I had a girl's night already scheduled, so then I went straight to see my college friends for dinner.  It was a great day!  The only bummer was my cell phone got lost over the weekend.  I had to finally give in and pay my insurance deductible and got a loaner phone.  But, I have no contacts in this temp phone.  So yesterday, I got all these sweet texts, and I had no idea who was sending them!  And I only had a few numbers written down to tell the good news.  Normally, I could have updated my blog and facebook from my phone, but not with the loaner-augh!  So sorry for the delay.  There is good news on that story too though; despite an outrageous deductible, they upgraded my phone times two because they were out of mine.  I told dh it is still a crummy brand of phone, but now I have the deluxe model!  I have joined the world of 3g, and hopefully my battery will make it through the day now.  One can hope. :) 

Thanks again for all the sweet comments and prayers!  I am floating today.  Hopefully, now, I won't wake in the night with lists of to do's floating through my head.  That is the worst!

Big Meeting Tomorrow

I am looking forward to getting back in the loop soon, but until then I have a prayer request.  My dissertation meeting is tomorrow, 11:30am CST.  They either pass me, meaning I am at least half way done, or they send me back to the drawing board.  If they do that, I have to petition to extend my program and there is no chance of getting done prior to the baby arriving.  I would definitely appreciate your prayers, and please know you are in mine!
p.s. my progesterone went from 30s to 50s with the last draw-crazy!  And the baby is wiggling all over and I LOVE IT!

I'm Back! Sortof, lol

I missed you all and hearing about your lives!  But I can say that you have really outdone yourself on the prayers.  I literally was carried by them through the whole process.  Everything really alighned better than I could have imagined, seriously.  I mean I worked day and evening, and normally I would have been so aching to spend time with Craig and Charlie.  But Charlie did great with the extra daycare besides the transition going there being a little rougher.  I spent all the quality time I could when he got home through bedtime, a short window, and then back to work.  All my prep time really paid off and I was actually seeing the fruits of my labor for the first time.  It was exhilerating.  I was happy at how it came together and passionate about my topic.  Normally I would ache to be with my husband and do what he is doing.  He chose this time to get on fire with some house projects like I have never seen him.  It made working so much easier!  He was also very helpful with Charlie and around the house.  The night before it was due I had to stay up all night and work.  It was hard for me to know the whole time how much longer I needed!  I really am an 11-7 sleeper and need those eight hours to function.  But at 10pm, I wasn't tired.  I realized that I had had half a soda with dinner, and it had caffeine in it.  It wasn't intention to stay up, it was just an odd thing I did.  Caffeine is something I rarely drink even when not pregnant, but I have often told people it has zero affect on me.  But it seemed to when I needed it.  So at 10pm, I realized and drank the other half of the can.  At four pm I went to bed, but I didn't even feel tired.  And I had gotten a lot done!  I won't lie, the 7am wakeup was rough!  I seriously don't think I have ever stayed up working that late, even in college.  So this was a big deal and one I didn't know if I could do.  I just felt so good all week working on this paper.  And yesterday, after three hours sleep, I was fine.  I wasn't exhausted.  I had my paper turned in by time I got Charlie up from his nap. Did I mention my methodologist replied to my emails quickly and comprehensively and was really encouraging?  Such a great feeling!  It's in my advisor's hands now, and I need to him to make the edits quickly (and hopefully not to many) because I have to incorporate them and get it out to my committee no later than Wednesday.  Then we meet on the 23rd for me to defend it.  This is the proposal, not the whole enchilada, but its half of the final product.  In my opinion it is the hardest half, to start from scratch and justify it all.  If my committee disagrees with my idea, they will stop it earlier as opposed to later.  Since my data is already collected from a grant I work on, this is really the hardest part I think.  So I have a little breather, and then its back to work again. :)  Again, thanks for the prayers!  And in all the craziness, I got to hear the baby's heartbeat and he/she started moving like crazy and I can feel lit.  Love it! 

Horrible Home Situations-Prayers Needed

I am just hopping on to ask, no beg, for prayers.  I have mentioned my sister JC and her family before.  They are all the stereotypes you can come up and the poster people for bad decisions.  Enough said.  Yesterday there was an abuse situation at their house, the husband was choking my sister (JC).  She called in her 17 year old daughter to help, who is living with my mom.  My dad, who isn't known for good decision making (literally, he has dx mental health conditions-yes, multiple) took her over there not realizing the situation (but still evidence of his bad decision making) and he got into it with the husband, of course, because who can stand their daughter going through that (even if she does make horrid bad decisions, like marrying a drug addict...no one deserves that).  Well my dad got his head bashed against the wall by husband and was physically hurt.  To add insult to injury, my sister told him if she were the husband she would have hurt him too for things he said (the truth hurts-that was all my dad was saying).  The 6 and 8 year old witnessed everything from the choking to their dad hurting their grandpa.  Hence even more trauma and chances that they are not going to get through this okay.  The husband says he is leaving for another state.  If we would be so lucky!  I am sure it is a bluff.  I think my sister wants him to go, but on her own terms (when she is better able to take care of the kids) in a few years.  No one is filing charges as they should be.  The kids are staying with my other older sister (JB).  If husband leaves, sister has no car and not enough income to keep their home.  She already tried living with my parents and that was a disaster so that will not be an option again.  And sister likely lost her job because husband wouldn't take her to work yesterday and she was already on probation with the job.  Husband has all sorts of control over her these ways-isolated her from her family (my sister took her husbands side over my mom's and isn't speaking to her), no car, and recently he didn't pay their cell bills so there is no way to even contact her.  Most of us don't even know where they are living.  Did I mention it is a bad situation?  Maybe husband will be picked up-I mean he just got in a wreck the other day and he is driving without insurance or a license, it is all bound to catch up with him. I know there is government help, she could do section 8 housing again probably.  I know God will provide unless it is time for her to hit bottom.  I don't want the kids to suffer from their parents' mistakes.  Obviously this situation needs prayers thrown at it like crazy.  As much as I am frustrated by my sister daily, she is my sister.  I love her, but not her choices.  I don't want to see her suffer, but if it results in her making changes, it will be worth it.  Again, just asking for your prayers.  The sad thing is, this should bother me more than it does.  It should keep me awake at night.  It should derail my dissertation.  But its not.  I really think I may be coming immune to these types of things.  Sadly.  This is the crazy world I grew up in.  But I survived, no thrived.  And maybe her kids will too?  In my house it was 50/50 on who came out ahead.  Did I mention my sister (JB, obviously not JC) and mom are both social workers?  My sister's field is actually domestic abuse.  Sigh. 
P.S. I can feel your prayers.  Dissertation is going well.  My birthday was a thousand times better than Mother's Day.  Husband is being a rockstar helping out.

My Conversion Story-yes, I am breaking my fast for this!

Okay, so its my birthday and I am cheating with my blog fast.  I am allowed right? Lol.  I just popped on and I love love love reading others' stories.  Mine is already on my blog, some of you have read it and commented, some may have read and just not commented, but since it is 100% who I am I thought it was appropriate I link to it here.  My story shows how my conversion is completely tied to my leaving behind birth control, turning a corner with my furture dh, finding NFP (for health reasons before we were even married!), which of course lead me to authentically treat my issues, and have my babies!  As you can see, it is tied to all things dear to me.  I know it is long, but since I am blog fasting, you have plenty of time to catch up, right?! ;)

http://tool4god-myjourneywithgod.blogspot.com/2008/12/finding-young-adult-group.html

http://tool4god-myjourneywithgod.blogspot.com/2008/12/steubenville-getting-hit-with-god-bat.html

http://tool4god-myjourneywithgod.blogspot.com/2008/12/coming-home-to-face-music.html

http://tool4god-myjourneywithgod.blogspot.com/2008/12/beginning-of-physical-healing-and.html

 Also it explains the name of my blog, which in hindsight appears like I am totally tooting my own horn at completely perfect at living God's will (obviously not the case-either of them, as you can tell from reading!), but of course, it is the goal to be "in the wheelbarrow" and so I pick myself up and get back in as much as possible in my own sinfullness.  And please, if you are bored and wanting more blog updates while I remain on break, please go back and read more earlier stuff! 

Temporarily Signing Off (short term)

Stepping off blogger temporarily so I can make a dissertation deadline (June 10th).  This is insanely hard for me (stepping away), and I definitely need prayers for self control and perserverance please.