6.09.2010

Horrible Home Situations-Prayers Needed

I am just hopping on to ask, no beg, for prayers.  I have mentioned my sister JC and her family before.  They are all the stereotypes you can come up and the poster people for bad decisions.  Enough said.  Yesterday there was an abuse situation at their house, the husband was choking my sister (JC).  She called in her 17 year old daughter to help, who is living with my mom.  My dad, who isn't known for good decision making (literally, he has dx mental health conditions-yes, multiple) took her over there not realizing the situation (but still evidence of his bad decision making) and he got into it with the husband, of course, because who can stand their daughter going through that (even if she does make horrid bad decisions, like marrying a drug addict...no one deserves that).  Well my dad got his head bashed against the wall by husband and was physically hurt.  To add insult to injury, my sister told him if she were the husband she would have hurt him too for things he said (the truth hurts-that was all my dad was saying).  The 6 and 8 year old witnessed everything from the choking to their dad hurting their grandpa.  Hence even more trauma and chances that they are not going to get through this okay.  The husband says he is leaving for another state.  If we would be so lucky!  I am sure it is a bluff.  I think my sister wants him to go, but on her own terms (when she is better able to take care of the kids) in a few years.  No one is filing charges as they should be.  The kids are staying with my other older sister (JB).  If husband leaves, sister has no car and not enough income to keep their home.  She already tried living with my parents and that was a disaster so that will not be an option again.  And sister likely lost her job because husband wouldn't take her to work yesterday and she was already on probation with the job.  Husband has all sorts of control over her these ways-isolated her from her family (my sister took her husbands side over my mom's and isn't speaking to her), no car, and recently he didn't pay their cell bills so there is no way to even contact her.  Most of us don't even know where they are living.  Did I mention it is a bad situation?  Maybe husband will be picked up-I mean he just got in a wreck the other day and he is driving without insurance or a license, it is all bound to catch up with him. I know there is government help, she could do section 8 housing again probably.  I know God will provide unless it is time for her to hit bottom.  I don't want the kids to suffer from their parents' mistakes.  Obviously this situation needs prayers thrown at it like crazy.  As much as I am frustrated by my sister daily, she is my sister.  I love her, but not her choices.  I don't want to see her suffer, but if it results in her making changes, it will be worth it.  Again, just asking for your prayers.  The sad thing is, this should bother me more than it does.  It should keep me awake at night.  It should derail my dissertation.  But its not.  I really think I may be coming immune to these types of things.  Sadly.  This is the crazy world I grew up in.  But I survived, no thrived.  And maybe her kids will too?  In my house it was 50/50 on who came out ahead.  Did I mention my sister (JB, obviously not JC) and mom are both social workers?  My sister's field is actually domestic abuse.  Sigh. 
P.S. I can feel your prayers.  Dissertation is going well.  My birthday was a thousand times better than Mother's Day.  Husband is being a rockstar helping out.

14 comments:

mrsblondies said...

I'm praying for your sister and her children. I hope that they can find a safe place soon.

Kaitlin @ More Like Mary said...

I'll add them to my prayers!

Andrea Starosciak said...

I am so sorry to hear about this horrible situation - I will pray for all of you!

prayerfuljourney said...

Well..hopefully your family can help with some of the decision making since this is their field...I know your sister will do what she wants but it helps if others can guide. Sounds like it's already hit rock bottom...so the only way there is is up. Praying for your family!

Leila said...

Horrible, especially with children involved! I will pray!

ALIVEINHOPE said...

Praying!!

Second Chances said...

That's so sad. I'm sorry your family is suffering in so many ways. We'll pray for you all!

JellyBelly said...

Praying!!!

Ann - Building a Nest said...

I'm so sorry! That's a horrible situation for your whole family. I said prayers for you, your sister, dad, & family today during my rosary.

the misfit said...

I will definitely be praying for your sister and her family. You're right - this may be a time when she can see things get bad enough to make some changes (maybe if your dad would say "we can't help you with that, you need help from the police" instead of driving her daughter over...). And seriously, I get about the taking the family insanity in stride. You're *not* a bad person for not freaking out over what's bad, but daily. You can't fix it; you can love her and pray for her, but freaking out isn't a moral obligation and would help no one. If a hairdresser has a client die in front of her, she's totally within her rights to lose it. An emergency room nurse? No. Doesn't make her heartless. It's just adjustment.

WheelbarrowRider said...

Thanks, everyone. Your comments and prayers are most helpful! First couple sections of dissertation are going to my advisor tomorrow at noon. I think I can make it, but its gonna be a late night. Its great to finally see the fruits of my labor!!!

Sissy said...

So sorry your family is going through this...yikes! Keep your chin up!

Trustful Surrender said...

I'm so sorry! Prayers.

Jill said...

Oh no! I know JB can use her expertise to help her through this but I'm sure it is much harder when it's a family member and not a client. I'm praying for you sister :(

On another note...Happy belated Birthday!