My Dh and a Huge Prayer Request

I will post about the funeral shortly, but right now I want to talk about my dh. Through this pregnancy, he was excited and also worried just like I was. The only difference was he was working up to 85 hrs (his busiest time) as he is a Controller for a Fortune 500 company and in charge of all their filings with the SEC. He didn't have the luxury of the two girl's nights I had last week where I felt so loved. Or in receipt of all the wonderful Facebook, blog, and text messages of support in prayer. the flowers that were sent to me. He is removed from the comfort, but not the pain.

He continues to burn the candle at both ends. He came to two doc appts for heartbeats. He came to as much of my D&C as he was able. He barely got 45 minutes off for the funeral. While I took the whole day off and was able to go out to lunch with a friend after. He is not only working, but also looking for another job. He is the only candidate right now for the ideal position-and the worst timing ever. He preps for interviews, works, and comes home to prep for interviews again. Even though he likely has this position (he wowed the CFO on the first interview), since then he has flown to Portland to interview with 5 people back to back (with a parent company). That was last weekend. Then Thursday, he had an interview before he went to work with HR, and then with the other parent company after work. This Sunday we thought he would have to fly to Denver for the last interview, but the snowstorm made that delayed. And while he is ready to get it all over with, I know this was God's timing.  He continues to do his best to support me and be an awesome dad throughout all of this.

Earlier this week, around Tuesday and Wednesday, I was having a small pity party. I didn't want to do Lent. I felt like I was already at the end of forty long days of sacrifice and self denial. I was in the desert. But a post from a friend on a miscarriage support group changed my thinking. She posted a Love Dare. Immediately I got excited. I have been thinking about dh and his sacrifice for our family. How emotionally, physically, and spiritually drained he is. My focus has changed to what can I do for him this Lent to show my love and appreciation?

Three and a half years ago I went on an incredible retreat. It wasn't great timing, but I went anyway. I took my 6 month old with me. It fed my soul! I also met some incredible people I still have relationships with. I prayed dh would have this experience, but he kept putting it off. I stopped bringing it up and started nagging God instead. This year, I about fell out of the pew when he told me he wanted to sign up. He had the caveat that if work got crazy he would have to back out. I understood. When the interview came up, I understood. But now that is pushed back, and he is free to attend.

One of the most powerful parts of the retreat is at the end. That is when you hear, really realize, how many people have been praying for you all weekend. And then the letters pour in. letters of encouragement, appreciation, and prayer. It's so wonderful to receive these. I sort of dropped the ball on the fact that I am actually to get others to write these letters as well.  I had forgotten that part. But I got so excited, realizing this was exactly what dh needs right now. And so I sent a plea out to those I thought would be interested. And the response has been incredible. You are part of that plea. If you would pray for my dh this weekend, I would so greatly appreciate it! He needs this relationship with God. He needs to lean on Him. He needs to be rejuvenated. And He needs to understand how losing this baby fits with the idea of a loving and merciful God.

Thank you so much for all your prayers and kind words. But if at least for this weekend, you could direct those at my dh, it would mean so much! Any comments left below will copied and shared with him. Thanks in advance!

Urgent Prayer Request

Tonight my niece lost her dad.  She is 17 years old.  He was only 38.  It was unexpected.  It was a medical condition-cardiac arrest and I guess he had a seizure condition.  He had step children when he was married and one or two other biological children that are very young (maybe six at the oldest?)  He has been around my family for a long time.  He was part of my sisters' world in high school and beyond.  They probably dated 10 years, though never married.  I am sure my sister is going through the whole gammet of emotions tonight.

My niece wasn't in a good place before this happened.  She just started her senior year.  Halfway through her junior year she was uprooted to a new state.  She misses her friends.  She is unimpressed with the local journalism program that was her life back in IN.  She doesn't get along with her mom, my sister or her stepdad (who does?! my sister is manipulative, selfish, and in an abusive marriage-a tough situation all around). She is living with my mom, her grandma, just a few blocks away from her own mom.  She wasn't on good terms with her dad, but it was typical teenage stuff.  And now they won't ever have the opportunity to rectify the situation.

Immediately my heart was full of sadness upon hearing the news.  Selfishly, at first I thought only of how it would impact my niece-his relationship with her, his financial support, the funeral expenses etc.  A million thoughts entered my mind about how she could possibly rise above all the situations going on her life prior to this even happening.  It just screams risk factors at such a pivotal time in her life. She doesn't practice any faith at all.  It didn't take long to realize this situation is beyond me, it is beyond logic, and that means it must be handed over immediately and fully to God.  This is a situation that calls for fervent prayer and trust.  Only God can turn the impossible possible.  With the guidance of the Holy Spirit, over time, she can respond to this tragedy in a way that results in her being better for it.  My husband lost his father at 12.  It was life changing, but I credit the man he is to the fact that he has come through that tragedy.  And perhaps, with time, he can talk to her about his own situation as only someone can who has been through it. 

I am turning to you, much stronger, more faith filled people than I.  I beg you to storm heaven with prayers for my niece, that she may come through this.   God can turn all things new.  Who knows?  Maybe this is how she is supposed to finally return home to her Catholic faith.

Begging All Prayer Warriors

Please join me tonight in storming heaven for a dear friend.  I have mentioned her before to you-after many years of trying, with the help of Dr. Toth and Hilgers, she and her husband finally conceived and had a beautiful daughter on their first try post Dr. Toth's full treatment.  Their daughter is a little older than Charlie.  They ttc on the same cycle as us for #2 and were successful, due one week before us.  She had a healthy beautiful heartbeat.  And then today, it was gone.  She is ten weeks. I write to you through tears in disbelief.  This women is so good, so deserving, such an amazing faith-filled Catholic that lives it to her core.  I admire her so much, and I ached to my core to read this tonight.  Here is her email:

"Now today's appointment wasn't so good. The doctor did the doppler and of course it wasn't to surprising to not hear anything because I wasn't necessarily far enough along, but the follow-up US did not look hopeful. We didn't see any blood with the baby (when she switched to something that highlighted blood movement), and the baby seemed younger than it was supposed to be, and no heartbeat. So tomorrow we are doing a transvaginal with the specialist for this age. Slim chance that this US is wrong, but we aren't all that hopeful. The sack was still good quality, but I wonder if the progesterone shots were prolonging it. So there is a good chance I am miscarrying. I suspect the infection is the most likely culprit because the quality of that mucus build-up was so good. So please keep us in your prayers".


I know God can provide a miracle, should He see fit in His infinite wisdom.  I have called on you girls to pray before, and you have always come through ten fold.  Please, I am begging you selfishly, lift her and her husband and their child up in your prayers and plead God for the miracle they so deserve!