8.01.2012

Head Spinning Over My Surprise BFP

How's that for a warning in the title for anyone not feeling up to reading?  Of course we all know there are no real surprises with Napro.  Only idiots that don't use the system properly like myself, lol. This cycle I was a lazy charter.  I have been for since I got my cycles back, I admit it.  I just haven't disciplined myself to get back in the habit 100%. Therefore I was mostly missing the prior to urination observation.
This cycle was odd.  I had surgery on CD 4 and we were supposed to avoid this cycle and ttc next. We bd for the first time post surgery on 7.10.12, cycle day 17.  I think was trying to get it in before we had to avoid during peak type mucus.  I have to laugh at that now.  I had peak type mucus on CD 18, but I didn't believe it due to my lazy charting.  Since we had BD the night before, I simply thought I didn't do the seminal instructions well.  Because of this I then didn't start my hcg shots until peak plus 4.  I did 4, 6, and then did the blood draw on 8dpo and THEN FORGOT the shot.  So then I did 9 and 11.  Lazy lazy lazy. 
I even got lazy with my meds.  I take baby asprin, B6, fiber, and prenatal every morning and then thyroid at 10am and 10pm.  I stayed on  my thyroid pretty well, but then about died going off my fiber (during which time I took an anticramping med-ack!  No idea how healthy that was in hindsight) so I started the fiber back up.  So for about a week I was off my meds (prenatal, aspirin, B6, and fiber-the ones I take first thing).  You know what else?  I didn't take my antibiotics.  Since we weren't ttc, I thought I was smart to wait to take the cyclical abx.  They are $30, but it was more about not taking more than necessary (I have not had TEBB). I had a half of beer one day.  I had a wine the day before I found out.  Add to this some emotional stuff I have had going on the last few weeks (including some facebook drama over chic fil A and same sex marriage that had my blood pressure up for 24 hrs.  I have eaten like crap.  I haven't been super hungry.  Too much sugar.  That is typical for me. The list goes on.  Not exactly how I would have wanted to do it had I known.
Yesterday was a work from home day.  I told dh my episode of crazy last weekend was likely due to my going to start my period anytime.  I was surprised it wasn't here yet, so I got on my computer to update my charting file.  Boy did I get a surprise.  Twenty dpo.  Yes, I know I am an idiot.  I had on hpt in my cabinet (do I mention I never do those-I did them randomly during breastfeeding when I felt like it, but I don't use that form to test on hcg-If I make it to the date, its always been positive).  So I poas.  So inexperienced am I that I read the stick wrong initially thinking it was the test strip that popped up immediately. Not so. I stared.  I shook.  I looked again.  I realize now how people misread the obvious.  Its the emotional state they are in when they take them! I got a fb message from Leila.  Not having told my husband yet, in my shock I tell her and ask for prayers. I drug out the requisition for hcg quant.  I left a voicemail with Dr. Hilgers. I looked up the due date (April 3rd, 2012) and drove to the lab. I called dh and got vm.  I was stunned.  I thought of all I did and didn't do to make everything safe for this baby.  I gave it over to God.  This was clearly His plan.
I went to the lab.  The wait was FOREVER. I said a rosary.  My husband called me back.  He was in shock too.  I know b/c he asked how did this happen a few times.  Lol.  Can you tell we aren't used to surprises (he is happy, just surprised). I got my lab drawn.  They do it stat while I wait.  I didn't wait.  I couldn't sit around.  I knew it was positive and there was stuff to coordinate! I went upstairs instead to my ob.  I wanted to tell them what was going on and ask for two more requisitions for quant hcg stat please, so we could tell when we had the okay to do the IV.  I also wanted to set up my ultrasound for 6 1/2 weeks (8/13/12).  Another lady came in the waiting room.  I was surprised to see her b/c she was older (48) and said she was just in 3 weeks ago (I overheard)-didn't seem typical.  I saw her Project Gabriel bag.  Since we are seeing a Catholic Napro ob/gyn, I asked her if that was the ProLife Ministry assosciated with the Catholic church and I got that and so much more.  She has her own Napro story, a patient of Dr. Dixon's.  She was amazing.  We loved swapping stories and the nurse came to get both of us way too soon.  She pulls a ziploc bag out of her bag and tells me to touch.  It is a relic, long story, of Mother Theresa.  Or St. Therese.  So mad I don't remember, but it all happened so fast.  But I have her name, Hilary, and I will be able to track her down through mutual friends.  I want to talk more with her, maybe go to lunch!  Touching that relic-that can do more than erase all the meds I didn't take or all the things I did.  It can erase the effects of my uterine septum (at surgery I learned I have it and that it causes late miscarriages; somehow though, I have my boys here).  So, I am resting in that knowledge and peace.  I hope it lasts, but I know that is mostly up to me.  While I was in Dr. Snider's office, my favorite lab lady Betty called.  She asked if I was sitting down so I knew it was a good number.  899 people!   Unheard of!  I never tested so late, but still.  899!

So what is ahead?  Last night I got a progesterone shot in each hip since I have the non compounded form-ouch! I have an hcg draw Thursday morning, first thing.  I will probably get my IV that afternoon if all looks good.  I have another hcg Saturday.  After that I will try to leave behind the hcg insanity. That Monday my local ob wants labs they do for each pregnancy (urine, blood typing, etc).  The following Monday, Aug. 13th, I get the IV out and will be just over 6 1/2 weeks. I will get an ultrasound that day to look for a heartbeat.  Praying we will hear one and won't have to reschedule to try again.  So that is the plan for now.  Lot of ultrasounds and followup.  Antibiotics every 8 weeks and one at delivery, God willing.  Charlie and Anthony are 25 months apart.  Anthony and sweet baby will be 30 months.  So grateful. 

Also grateful for any prayers you can offer for a healthy pregnancy!  And I will offer every progesterone shot and discomfort of this pregnancy, even labor (God willing!) for everyone still waiting!  I hope this post isn't a slap in the face to anyone who is currently ttc.  It simply our story, with all its weird twists and turns.  I do not know why we have been so fortunate in this area.  Honestly, in the beginning (way before I met all of you) I admit, I thought it was reward for throwing away our pills and trusting God.  I patted myself on the back.  I started this blog for others that were ttc using ART or tempted to.  But I met all of you.  I got to know you.  Now I know that couldn't be further from the truth.  God did write our amazing story.  We don't know why.  It isn't anything we did.  But we will shout if from the rooftops to glorify his name and hopefully people will listen and leave ART and birth control behind.  But we know now the truth.  We don't deserve this.  We didn't earn it.  Many many people would have been blessed with a child by now if that was how it worked.  Blogging has brought me in touch so many more faithful and knowledgable than I am. And yet they wait.  You wait.  And I don't know why.  All I can do is listen, be your friend, jump in when I have an experience that might relate, and pray.  And so I will continue to do these things.

For those of you that know me in real life, this is obviously far from public knowledge at this point.  I am meeting my mom to tell her in person tomorrow, so no fb acknowledgments or spilling the beans!

25 comments:

Chasing said...

Wow! Congrats!

Hebrews 11:1 said...

What a wonderful "surprise!" Congrats!

Simone said...

Holy Crap! That is so awesome. Was this your first or second cycle back? I lost track. I know you just had the surgery too. This is great news! Thanks for sharing. WoW Good Luck.

More Than Anything said...

Congratulations!!! Holy surprise!! Praying for you and baby!

My Heart Exults said...

What a wonderful surprise. Congratulations!

WheelbarrowRider said...

Holy Surprise-I love that! Thanks for your prayers and words of encouragment. I knew most of you would appreciate the shock of a surprise under our circumstances. I updated the original post to clarify-my surgery was CD 4. We were supposed to avoid this cycle and try the next. We bd CD 17 for the first time post surgery. I had peak type CD 18. That's it. I can't believe we never made it one cycle post surgery. Crazy!

JoAnna Wahlund said...

Congratulations!

mrsblondies said...

Wonderful news! Congratulations! My DH's birthday is 4/3 and K's is 4/8.

From Pam and John to Mom and Dad said...

Congratulations! What a fabulous surprise!!

Joy Beyond the Cross said...

Congratulations! Great news!!!! Grow, Baby, GROW!

M said...

Yay! Congratulations! Praying for you and your sweet surprise!

ALIVEINHOPE said...

Oh, my goodness, girl! That is AMAZING!! :) Praying...

JellyBelly said...

Wow! Congrats!!

All in His Perfect Timing said...

YAYYYYY!!!! Congratulations!!!!! That is a GOD-inspired baby! :-) Amazing story!!!! I'm so glad you shared! I'll pray for you!!!

Sunshine said...

Congrats!!

It's kind of nice to have a head spinning pregnancy :)

Kaitlin @ More Like Mary said...

Yay! How awesome!

Sew said...

Congratulations!!! So fun! :)

Brenda said...

Well, look at you!!! That is such wonderful news! I am so happy for you! Can't wait to see your FB announcement:)

Infertile Catholic said...

Congratulations! How wonderful! Prayers for you and your little baby!

A Martha trying to be Mary said...

Amazing, amazing!!! Love this!!!! Congratulations!!

Amazing Life said...

So happy for you! God is fabulous at giving such marvelous gifts!!!

Anonymous said...

Hi Jamie! I am so happy for you! I just had an HSG in Omaha yesterday and things look good. Keeping my fingers crossed! Hopefully your IV goes well - do you always get a PIC line?
Andrea Starosciak

Mrs. Mike said...

Congratulations!!!! This is great news!!!

Angela said...

OH MY GOSH!!! Congratulations!!! What a wonderful blessing!! Yay, go God!

Megan said...

Very exciting!! Congratulations!! :)