Uncomfortableness in Infants and Resolutions

I was only dreading going to my MIL for Christmas for one reason-AJ was off before and I knew being out of town, etc, it would take him a bit to get back on track and I wouldn't know if it was that or something else...what was going on is that AJ is grunting for long (like one hour or more) periods in the night and seems really uncomfortable.  I have a child with reflux and this is similar, but I wasn't totally confident as it appeared different and definitely isn't as severe or black and white as when Charlie had it.  Anthony is also struggling with sleeping.  He cat napped in the am, then slept well in the afternoon.  He did pretty good at night.  He had gone to more 40 min naps (no longer any long stretches) I could tell he was tired and wanted to sleep longer.  Plus I think I feed him more (every 2 hrs), unnecessarily, when he is up more.  I think, hey he's up so why not feed him so when he does sleep he doesn't have to wake to eat.  It isn't just me-AJ thinks this too! :)

I ended up going to the doctor today and they helped me sort out what I knew in my heart-two separate things were going on.  We have a plan!  It reaffirmed things I already knew and I feel really good we caught things early.

First of all, I am going back to rocking Anthony until sleepy, NOT asleep.  Otherwise he goes, hey what happened?  I was in warm arms one second and now a big bed the next.  No thanks, I prefer the arms!  Gma made this worse by holding him for all day every day we were there.  That would have been fine had I planned to continue that at home, but it is not realistic for us, so we are dealing with major transition issues.  Also, I realized I was contributing too, unknowingly to this.  Even though I don't hold him sleeping, I was starting to rock him to sleep most of the time and then transferring to bed in an attempt to get him sleep better/longer.  It did the opposite.  I realized that was almost the same thing as holding him for two days and then coming hom to using the bed.  It resulted in the "I am surprised to be in bed now/how did I get here?!" reaction.  AJ would either wake immediately or wake at 30-40 (after one sleep cycle) and protest at being in bed.  Also, when he protested, I would remove him from the bed and rerock him.  I had stopped trying to soothe him while he was still in his bed out of pure laziness, assuming it would get to the point I would have to rerock him anyway, I would skip to that step.  I have resolved again to rock until sleepy and also to soothe in bed.  It isn't that hard at this age-a paci and a some covering his eyes or rubbing from his forehead down over his eyes and he gets sleepy again.  Then I leave him to fall asleep in his bed.  AJ was doing great putting himself back to sleep before, I could always here him going in and out for the long naps, but he had stopped that so I think we caught it early enough that he will go back to his natural good habits.  Several times when he was doing better I would hear him, go in, and he'd be asleep.  He was always exceeding my expectations so good habits are definitely natural to him and I just have to get him back there!

Second of all, the doc did think he has reflux.  I felt good going in giving all my data, etc and letting her make the decision rather than being convinced and fighting for a script.  I was just not sure, but she thought yes, so I feel good giving the meds.  I am tired of seeing my good boy so uncomfortable!  He would just writhe and grunt forever and I couldn't sleep either, listening to every move on the monitor etc.  At least now I can do something about it!

So a new day and more resolutions to do what I know I should do.  Oh, and speaking of, I have just two this year after bombing mine every year (see last year's embarrassing repeat of the year before-it is kind of funny in a pathetic way).  One: finish my dissertation.  Sort of a given, I HAVE to be done in May, but worth mentioning for all the time and effort it will take.  And Two: for weight and for money, I will no longer throw a bag of check out candy onto the belt with my groceries.  Or a pound of m&m's.  This went from occaisional to EVERY time I go to the store.  And I go to the store a lot :)  Happy New Year's everyone!  Be safe!


Second Chances said...

I'm so glad to hear that AJ's back to good sleep habits and his reflux is under control! I just posted about Dominic's milk protein allergy. It's a battle. I'm trying to be patient and remember that results are slow to come. I hope it helps though. I relate to your sleeping issue with AJ in that Dom sleeps 30-40 minutes and then wakes up. This accounts for 2 out of his 3 naps during the day, and now he's started waking up in the night again. Agghh!! I'm not sure why. What do you think? He's never been a long napper, except on occassion I'll get him to take a 1 1/2 - 2 hour nap. But mainly just cat naps in his bed, swaddled. As for the night waking, what the heck? We tried to rock him back to sleepy, but not asleep, but it's no good. He wants to eat! So I feed him after a few tries. I don't know. Just when you think you have it all figured out!

Anyway, happy new year!!!

WheelbarrowRider said...

Well, I wouldn't say we have it all figured out, of course...as you mentioned it is so fluid! But I will say I got a 2.5 hr nap out of him the first time I tried this-so nice to get instant results! Other times when he wakes at 40 min I have been able to (3 times since yesterday!) get to go back down by giving his paci back in his crib without removing him/rerocking etc. However, maybe D is just going through a growing spurt? IDK but if he needs to eat and he didn't before, I think it is okay. But hard on mama. Sorry I don't have the answer, but I would def try with all your might to get him to go back down to make those day naps longer. When he is a little older it may mean crying some, but you don't have to go there yet. Charlie did those short ones and it was so hard. They have to learn to go back to sleep, with as little intervention as possible, but in the beginning, anything it takes to get him back down and then start fading back how much you help once he does that consistently. Sometimes that may also mean two longer naps instead of three, but I am not sure offhand how age approp that is. He is still pretty little.

Second Chances said...

Yes, you totally make sense! So now my question is how often should he be eating? Cuz it's every 2 hours unless he does take a long nap, then it's 3 and sometimes 4 hours in between feedings. I feel like he wakes up from his nap because he's hungry. Am I overfeeding him do you think?

Sissy said...

I love that one of the things you want to stop doing is throwing candy on the conveyor belt! That made me smile. You can do it!

Danya @ He Adopted Me First said...

Oh the sleep thing...I'm dreading it! I can't stand to hear my babies cry and get all worked up BUT they'll never let you put them down otherwise. It's so hard. Reflux is hard too. Our little guy has been on Nexium for the last 7 months and is just now coming off of it (he's 16 months old). One day before meds. he spit up 9 times before 9 a.m. It was awful since my sense of smell and gag reflex is stronger because of pregnancy - but we made it through. More war stories! Hahahaha! Infancy always feels like a giant experiment and then once you've figured out the equation, the factors change (teething, travel, illness, etc.). Buhbye m&ms. Now what shall I take off the conveyor? Hmmmmmm.

Thankful said...

I needed this post! Thanks. :-) Great resolution, too.