Tonight my niece lost her dad. She is 17 years old. He was only 38. It was unexpected. It was a medical condition-cardiac arrest and I guess he had a seizure condition. He had step children when he was married and one or two other biological children that are very young (maybe six at the oldest?) He has been around my family for a long time. He was part of my sisters' world in high school and beyond. They probably dated 10 years, though never married. I am sure my sister is going through the whole gammet of emotions tonight.
My niece wasn't in a good place before this happened. She just started her senior year. Halfway through her junior year she was uprooted to a new state. She misses her friends. She is unimpressed with the local journalism program that was her life back in IN. She doesn't get along with her mom, my sister or her stepdad (who does?! my sister is manipulative, selfish, and in an abusive marriage-a tough situation all around). She is living with my mom, her grandma, just a few blocks away from her own mom. She wasn't on good terms with her dad, but it was typical teenage stuff. And now they won't ever have the opportunity to rectify the situation.
Immediately my heart was full of sadness upon hearing the news. Selfishly, at first I thought only of how it would impact my niece-his relationship with her, his financial support, the funeral expenses etc. A million thoughts entered my mind about how she could possibly rise above all the situations going on her life prior to this even happening. It just screams risk factors at such a pivotal time in her life. She doesn't practice any faith at all. It didn't take long to realize this situation is beyond me, it is beyond logic, and that means it must be handed over immediately and fully to God. This is a situation that calls for fervent prayer and trust. Only God can turn the impossible possible. With the guidance of the Holy Spirit, over time, she can respond to this tragedy in a way that results in her being better for it. My husband lost his father at 12. It was life changing, but I credit the man he is to the fact that he has come through that tragedy. And perhaps, with time, he can talk to her about his own situation as only someone can who has been through it.
I am turning to you, much stronger, more faith filled people than I. I beg you to storm heaven with prayers for my niece, that she may come through this. God can turn all things new. Who knows? Maybe this is how she is supposed to finally return home to her Catholic faith.
I am on the journey we are all called to-to accept God's will and perfect love. Whether I am white knuckling it with my eyes shut tight or standing up with my arms outstretched enjoying the ride, I try always to let God be the driver and not bail out the side when there are bumps (like IF!). On good days, I trust He won't run me into a tree. :)
8.29.2010
8.25.2010
Welcome!
I hope the Drew Mariani show has brought some new readers to my blog. If so, welcome! I fell into the opportunity thanks to this lovely blogger. It was a wonderful chance to share the message of trusting God's will, spiritual and physical healing, and the wonderful work of Dr. Thomas Hilgers. There was so little time, I was only able to brush the surface of our amazing story. I hope you will take the time to read the details in the archives of this blog and learn more about how we found healing.
I have to apologize-there has not been much going on as of late so my more recent posts have been severely lacking in depth. I am at a loss for profound insights, somewhat understandable since can barely function with my pregnancy brain (I have lost my cell phone twice in the last three months and my camera has been gone for almost two months!). Luckily there is plenty of information in the archives to get you caught up on more details then you ever cared to know about my infertility, our spiritual as well as trying to conceive (ttc) journey, not to mention a good smattering of talk about cervical mucus to keep you blushing! ;) And I promise, more helpful resources to come! I am committed to staying involved in this area, it is such a passion of mine, and I feel that God wants us to share what He has done in our lives. My prayer is always to be a tool for God, but I am always aware I am a rusty and inadequate one. I pray the message comes across despite my own imperfections.
In addition to my blog, there is a wealth of knowledge and support just waiting for you if you start looking into the blogs I follow (mostly Catholic Infertility bloggers) and the ones they follow. These women have embraced me and others where we are at-in all our various phases of life, spirituality, and fertility. If you are not already aware, Yahoo Health has a group for Catholics related to infertility, just click here for the link. Our best resources for support and information are each other! It is important you know that you are not alone and this is not a cross of shame or one that you have to carry alone! Both blogs and the yahoo group allow you to access information and connect to others at whatever level you feel most comfortable, even completely anonymous should you choose.
Happy Reading! And please know you can always contact me personally through email!
God bless,
Jamie
I have to apologize-there has not been much going on as of late so my more recent posts have been severely lacking in depth. I am at a loss for profound insights, somewhat understandable since can barely function with my pregnancy brain (I have lost my cell phone twice in the last three months and my camera has been gone for almost two months!). Luckily there is plenty of information in the archives to get you caught up on more details then you ever cared to know about my infertility, our spiritual as well as trying to conceive (ttc) journey, not to mention a good smattering of talk about cervical mucus to keep you blushing! ;) And I promise, more helpful resources to come! I am committed to staying involved in this area, it is such a passion of mine, and I feel that God wants us to share what He has done in our lives. My prayer is always to be a tool for God, but I am always aware I am a rusty and inadequate one. I pray the message comes across despite my own imperfections.
In addition to my blog, there is a wealth of knowledge and support just waiting for you if you start looking into the blogs I follow (mostly Catholic Infertility bloggers) and the ones they follow. These women have embraced me and others where we are at-in all our various phases of life, spirituality, and fertility. If you are not already aware, Yahoo Health has a group for Catholics related to infertility, just click here for the link. Our best resources for support and information are each other! It is important you know that you are not alone and this is not a cross of shame or one that you have to carry alone! Both blogs and the yahoo group allow you to access information and connect to others at whatever level you feel most comfortable, even completely anonymous should you choose.
Happy Reading! And please know you can always contact me personally through email!
God bless,
Jamie
8.23.2010
These are a few of my favorite things...
I can't help myself, when I love something I have to share about it with others. I am a talker by nature. I figured this would also help some of you get to know me better. For those of you that know me well, it should come as no surprise that two of the three are food related!*
1. Lemonade from Chik-Fil-A
I am frugal (in some areas) and rarely order a drink with dinner (alcoholic or otherwise). I have never been big on soda, though I enjoy an occasional root beer with pizza. When others got a drink for a treat, I went for the chocolate in the vending machines. I have to say though, in terms of drinks, lemonade is a real treat. And not the kind that comes in a soda machine. That doesn't count. But real lemonade. I only knew one restaurant 20 min away that served real lemonade until today. When I discovered this just down the street. Look out dh, I may just have to have one every so often!
2. Reef brand Flip Flops-Ginger style
I told you I was frugal in some ways. I often have only one pair of shoes for everyday and one pair of dress shoes. Occasionally I have one brown pair and one black pair of something. I don't own enough to get flashy styles that will go out of style quickly. I actually don't enjoy shopping and spend most of our money and time shopping at Tar.get. I had no idea when I happened onto these flip flops about seven years ago, what a find they were-I have worn the SAME pair ever since! They are inexpensive ($15-20), cute and feminine, excellently made, and incredibly comfortable. Bet you didn't think arch support in a flip flop was possible-I didn't! They are cute, come in tons of colors (neutrals for me, pinks and blues for you with a little more style), and seriously have a marshmallow soft soul while still being supportive. They totally mold to your foot in a good way. I have bought other cheap pairs. I have bought some trendier brands (roxy etc). None were this comfortable or well made. I literally wore the tread off my reefs and then some, but it took a long time. After about 7 years of wearing them, I just bought two more pairs-black and brown-haha! I had sunk so far down in them the thong piece was a big ball under my foot compared to the rest. I decided maybe if I own two they will last ten years?!
3. Zone Perfect Double Dark Chocolate Protein Bars
When my dh first introduced me to protein bars, I made fun of him. I thought he was nuts. I told him, this peanut butter milk chocolate zone bar tastes nothing like a reeces. He laughed and said that isn't exactly what it was supposed to taste like. It tasted chalky. I hated it. However, when I noticed our local Sam's/Cost.co carrying the dark chocolate variety, I picked them up for him and tried one myself. They come in a two pack-almond and double chocolate. The almond are good, but some of that chalkiness remains. The double dark are like a candy bar. A good one. They meet my dh's criteria for decent amount protein without lots of other bad stuff (carbs, sugar...can you tell I know what I am talking about here? lol I am not knowledgable in this area-at all!) Anyway, I can satisfy my chocolate cravings without feeling guilty! Protein bars in general are expensive, and these are still up there, but where we get them you get 24 bars for $18-not bad!
What are things that you can't live without?
*I am just promoting these items for the fun of it
1. Lemonade from Chik-Fil-A
I am frugal (in some areas) and rarely order a drink with dinner (alcoholic or otherwise). I have never been big on soda, though I enjoy an occasional root beer with pizza. When others got a drink for a treat, I went for the chocolate in the vending machines. I have to say though, in terms of drinks, lemonade is a real treat. And not the kind that comes in a soda machine. That doesn't count. But real lemonade. I only knew one restaurant 20 min away that served real lemonade until today. When I discovered this just down the street. Look out dh, I may just have to have one every so often!
2. Reef brand Flip Flops-Ginger style
I told you I was frugal in some ways. I often have only one pair of shoes for everyday and one pair of dress shoes. Occasionally I have one brown pair and one black pair of something. I don't own enough to get flashy styles that will go out of style quickly. I actually don't enjoy shopping and spend most of our money and time shopping at Tar.get. I had no idea when I happened onto these flip flops about seven years ago, what a find they were-I have worn the SAME pair ever since! They are inexpensive ($15-20), cute and feminine, excellently made, and incredibly comfortable. Bet you didn't think arch support in a flip flop was possible-I didn't! They are cute, come in tons of colors (neutrals for me, pinks and blues for you with a little more style), and seriously have a marshmallow soft soul while still being supportive. They totally mold to your foot in a good way. I have bought other cheap pairs. I have bought some trendier brands (roxy etc). None were this comfortable or well made. I literally wore the tread off my reefs and then some, but it took a long time. After about 7 years of wearing them, I just bought two more pairs-black and brown-haha! I had sunk so far down in them the thong piece was a big ball under my foot compared to the rest. I decided maybe if I own two they will last ten years?!
3. Zone Perfect Double Dark Chocolate Protein Bars
When my dh first introduced me to protein bars, I made fun of him. I thought he was nuts. I told him, this peanut butter milk chocolate zone bar tastes nothing like a reeces. He laughed and said that isn't exactly what it was supposed to taste like. It tasted chalky. I hated it. However, when I noticed our local Sam's/Cost.co carrying the dark chocolate variety, I picked them up for him and tried one myself. They come in a two pack-almond and double chocolate. The almond are good, but some of that chalkiness remains. The double dark are like a candy bar. A good one. They meet my dh's criteria for decent amount protein without lots of other bad stuff (carbs, sugar...can you tell I know what I am talking about here? lol I am not knowledgable in this area-at all!) Anyway, I can satisfy my chocolate cravings without feeling guilty! Protein bars in general are expensive, and these are still up there, but where we get them you get 24 bars for $18-not bad!
What are things that you can't live without?
*I am just promoting these items for the fun of it
8.19.2010
Four Year Anniversary Post-It's Back :)
No, you aren't having deja vu! :) I started this post a few weeks ago and accidently published it for then instead of now on our actual anniversary (the 19th). I tried to delete the post, but keep it for later, but I couldn't figure it out and it was too much work to lose...So camee the early anniversary post! Then a fellow blogger, Ann from Building a Nest, in her infinite wisdom shared just what I needed to hear-how to unpublish, yet still save-thank you! So here it is again, you aren't seeing double! I actually had to do this because it was posted, yet still scheduled for the 19th and doing crazy things by ending up as my top post everytime, despite new posts-odd!
Today is dh's and my fourth wedding anniversary! I feel so crazy fortunate to be married to the love of my life. Since I haven't been on the blogs through an anniversary before, I thought I'd fill out a survey and show some pics (idea from GIMH-thanks!)
And if you want some extra long (but super cute story) reading, please check out the details of how we met by clicking here by clicking here. Also our engagement story is posted here. I actually wrote it up the night it happened while it was all fresh in my mind because I wanted to remember it forever. It may not be PW, but it makes my heart go pitter patter!
August is a hot one for a wedding, especially where I live, but given that we weren't interested in a long engagement (it was six months) and I wanted a summer wedding, so it worked out well. It actually ended up being in the 80s, not too terrible considering is has been in the 100s this year-yikes!
And what would a wedding post be without a few pics...
1. Where/how did you meet: The very short version is...in a bar. Twice. That neither of us really frequented. I didnt' give him my number the first time. I wasn't looking for a bar guy, but the second time I liked him more. His offer to meet me at church rather than exchanging numbers definitely peaked my interest!
2. How long have you known each other: Since 2003
3. How long after you met did you start dating: Upon the second meeting-maybe they were a month apart?
4. Where did you get engaged: At a really nice steak restaurant we were at to celebrate Valentine's day. Now he has to take me every year to celebrate-haha! Lucky me!
5. How long was your engagement: 6 months
6. How long have you been married: 4 years
7. What is your anniversary: August 19th
8. How many people came to your wedding reception: About 250-we both have big families and lots of friends and every dime we saved ended up just going to a larger guest list!
9. What kind of cake did you serve: I actually don't like cake so I didn't really care. It was pretty and simply done. A women made it in her home. I think it was chocolate. We also served cheesecakes-yum!
10. Where was your wedding: In Kansas City, the city of fountains!
11. What did you serve for your meal: bbq briscuit and chicken. We really lucked out how fabulous the meal was because it was dirt cheap!
12. How many people were there in your bridal party: 5-I have three sisters and one sister in law (far left) and my best friend was my made of honor (on my right when looking at the photo).
13. Are you still friends with them all: Of course!
14. Did you or your spouse cry during the ceremony: No, I was too happy to cry. I noticed way later that dh had his lip bit in the picture of me entering the church. I totally thought he was nervous, but he said no, he was going to cry I was so beautiful!
15. Most special moment of your wedding day: Dh and I really loved the whole thing. The ceremony was so beautiful, the reception was such a celebration. I will say we weren't around each other very much until about 10pm-it just flew past and we both were trying to get to see all of these out of town guests... at one point I say, I don't even know where my fiancee is and then I had to laugh that he was actually now my husband. It was the first time I had said those words!
16. Any funny moments: Evidently dh's fraternity brothers started using our vases as very large glasses! I was approached with a vase and they begged me to drink from it. I did, but I can't say I impressed anyone. I am no good at chugging and I learned that night that while groomsmen feel it is their duty to keep the groom's drink full at all cost, bridesmaids do not feel the same obligation. At least mine didn't! Probably beter because I was a lightweight. But when dh found out they were out of my drink and I hadn't had one, he sent a bartender to the liquor store. I think that I had one drink all night, besides a few gulps of this beer!
17. Any big disasters: Thankfully no-just near misses! We did have to make a bathroom stop while in the trolley, my husband's brother's girlfriend spill her drink on my dress and I about fell down the stairs at the reception thanks to my shoes! Oh yes, and my sister's one year old daughter took off her earing and put it in her mouth while my sister was giving us a toast. She knew, but you couldn't tell from her even tone. I can laugh now because no ER trip was necessary!
18. Where did you go on your honeymoon: the Riveria Maya, at an all inclusive in Mexico-wonderful!
20. If you were to do your wedding over...Nothing big. Some ladies forgot to put my daisies all over the cake so instead they were floating in water on the tables in addition to the centerpieces. The cake looked a little plain, but no one would notice or care, I am sure. And I didn't either-too much fun going on, too much to celebrate! Oh yes, the main thing "the girls" were hoisted too high and one was even coming out on a side and had to be edited out of photos...
21. What side of the bed do you sleep on: Further from the door, but I don't really care about that stuff and actually slept on the other side last night.
22. What size is your bed: King. And not to sound like a brat, but it really is too big. We snuggled a lot more when we had a smaller bed and dh and I are never ones to need our own space. However, I often find that we could fit two people btw us! Lol
23. Greatest strength as a couple: We can't stay mad long. About anything. We have instant memory loss when it comes to the others' faults.
24. Greatest challenge as a couple: Not being able to sleep together during our pregnancies. Yes, that's personal but true.
25. Who literally pays the bills: Dh. He is a CPA and very financially savvy. I am grateful I don't have to, even though I could. In a lot of my other dating relationships, the guys were so clueless about that stuff and not at all mindful of how they spent....
26. What is your song: At the wedding we danced to "At Last." We had to kiss a lot of frogs before we found each other! :) We have many informal songs that our ours though, we have always loved to dance and sing together (loud, badly, off key...). Here we are singing "American Pie."
27. What did you dance your first dance to: At Last
28. Describe your wedding dress: I wanted simple-this one was, but surprisingly still covered in lace. I loved the scallops at the bottom and across the bust.
29. What kind of flowers did you have at your wedding: Cala lilies-love them! But way too expensive to have everywhere, so there were other things thrown in.
30. Are your wedding bands engraved? No, we wanted to, but ended up going with comfort bands instead that can't be engraved. I thought it was best since dh isnt' used to wearing any sort of jewelry. I love that we have matching bands, it was so important to me that it is one of the main reasons I wanted a solitare so it would go together.
Today is dh's and my fourth wedding anniversary! I feel so crazy fortunate to be married to the love of my life. Since I haven't been on the blogs through an anniversary before, I thought I'd fill out a survey and show some pics (idea from GIMH-thanks!)
And if you want some extra long (but super cute story) reading, please check out the details of how we met by clicking here by clicking here. Also our engagement story is posted here. I actually wrote it up the night it happened while it was all fresh in my mind because I wanted to remember it forever. It may not be PW, but it makes my heart go pitter patter!
August is a hot one for a wedding, especially where I live, but given that we weren't interested in a long engagement (it was six months) and I wanted a summer wedding, so it worked out well. It actually ended up being in the 80s, not too terrible considering is has been in the 100s this year-yikes!
And what would a wedding post be without a few pics...
The trolley idea was from a wonderful friend that follows my blog and has her own. She graciously offered to help us plan our wedding simply because she loves weddings and knew my sister. How sweet is that?!
On to the fun wedding memories...I couldn't help but provide illustrations...1. Where/how did you meet: The very short version is...in a bar. Twice. That neither of us really frequented. I didnt' give him my number the first time. I wasn't looking for a bar guy, but the second time I liked him more. His offer to meet me at church rather than exchanging numbers definitely peaked my interest!
2. How long have you known each other: Since 2003
3. How long after you met did you start dating: Upon the second meeting-maybe they were a month apart?
4. Where did you get engaged: At a really nice steak restaurant we were at to celebrate Valentine's day. Now he has to take me every year to celebrate-haha! Lucky me!
5. How long was your engagement: 6 months
6. How long have you been married: 4 years
7. What is your anniversary: August 19th
8. How many people came to your wedding reception: About 250-we both have big families and lots of friends and every dime we saved ended up just going to a larger guest list!
9. What kind of cake did you serve: I actually don't like cake so I didn't really care. It was pretty and simply done. A women made it in her home. I think it was chocolate. We also served cheesecakes-yum!
10. Where was your wedding: In Kansas City, the city of fountains!
11. What did you serve for your meal: bbq briscuit and chicken. We really lucked out how fabulous the meal was because it was dirt cheap!
12. How many people were there in your bridal party: 5-I have three sisters and one sister in law (far left) and my best friend was my made of honor (on my right when looking at the photo).
13. Are you still friends with them all: Of course!
14. Did you or your spouse cry during the ceremony: No, I was too happy to cry. I noticed way later that dh had his lip bit in the picture of me entering the church. I totally thought he was nervous, but he said no, he was going to cry I was so beautiful!
15. Most special moment of your wedding day: Dh and I really loved the whole thing. The ceremony was so beautiful, the reception was such a celebration. I will say we weren't around each other very much until about 10pm-it just flew past and we both were trying to get to see all of these out of town guests... at one point I say, I don't even know where my fiancee is and then I had to laugh that he was actually now my husband. It was the first time I had said those words!
16. Any funny moments: Evidently dh's fraternity brothers started using our vases as very large glasses! I was approached with a vase and they begged me to drink from it. I did, but I can't say I impressed anyone. I am no good at chugging and I learned that night that while groomsmen feel it is their duty to keep the groom's drink full at all cost, bridesmaids do not feel the same obligation. At least mine didn't! Probably beter because I was a lightweight. But when dh found out they were out of my drink and I hadn't had one, he sent a bartender to the liquor store. I think that I had one drink all night, besides a few gulps of this beer!
17. Any big disasters: Thankfully no-just near misses! We did have to make a bathroom stop while in the trolley, my husband's brother's girlfriend spill her drink on my dress and I about fell down the stairs at the reception thanks to my shoes! Oh yes, and my sister's one year old daughter took off her earing and put it in her mouth while my sister was giving us a toast. She knew, but you couldn't tell from her even tone. I can laugh now because no ER trip was necessary!
18. Where did you go on your honeymoon: the Riveria Maya, at an all inclusive in Mexico-wonderful!
20. If you were to do your wedding over...Nothing big. Some ladies forgot to put my daisies all over the cake so instead they were floating in water on the tables in addition to the centerpieces. The cake looked a little plain, but no one would notice or care, I am sure. And I didn't either-too much fun going on, too much to celebrate! Oh yes, the main thing "the girls" were hoisted too high and one was even coming out on a side and had to be edited out of photos...
21. What side of the bed do you sleep on: Further from the door, but I don't really care about that stuff and actually slept on the other side last night.
22. What size is your bed: King. And not to sound like a brat, but it really is too big. We snuggled a lot more when we had a smaller bed and dh and I are never ones to need our own space. However, I often find that we could fit two people btw us! Lol
23. Greatest strength as a couple: We can't stay mad long. About anything. We have instant memory loss when it comes to the others' faults.
24. Greatest challenge as a couple: Not being able to sleep together during our pregnancies. Yes, that's personal but true.
25. Who literally pays the bills: Dh. He is a CPA and very financially savvy. I am grateful I don't have to, even though I could. In a lot of my other dating relationships, the guys were so clueless about that stuff and not at all mindful of how they spent....
26. What is your song: At the wedding we danced to "At Last." We had to kiss a lot of frogs before we found each other! :) We have many informal songs that our ours though, we have always loved to dance and sing together (loud, badly, off key...). Here we are singing "American Pie."
27. What did you dance your first dance to: At Last
28. Describe your wedding dress: I wanted simple-this one was, but surprisingly still covered in lace. I loved the scallops at the bottom and across the bust.
29. What kind of flowers did you have at your wedding: Cala lilies-love them! But way too expensive to have everywhere, so there were other things thrown in.
30. Are your wedding bands engraved? No, we wanted to, but ended up going with comfort bands instead that can't be engraved. I thought it was best since dh isnt' used to wearing any sort of jewelry. I love that we have matching bands, it was so important to me that it is one of the main reasons I wanted a solitare so it would go together.
8.17.2010
Third Trimester-y
Sorry for the repeat, but many may have missed this post since my accidental early anniversary post came right on its heels. Since I have nothing new to post, here it is again, with minor additions. :)
A long time ago I asked someone pregnant how they were feeling and they replied "very third trimester-y." I wasn't sure what it meant and don't recall if I was told by her or someone later. But ladies, I am so there.
Not to complain. But to inform. And warn. And, okay, maybe to complain a little? If you are anywhere near the 2nd trimester, enjoy it, ladies. Because right now I have the urge to do more. To clean my house top to bottom, etc etc etc. And my body, well it just won't cooperate. It's large. Yes. I have now gained30 32lbs and I was not big to begin with. It is mostly in my belly (though I'd be lying if I said I didn't look pregnant from behind, I recently saw a photo!) and putting a lot of strain on my hips. Especially my sciatic nerve. Ouch! Basically it starts to hurt from my ankle all the way up to my hip. Sometimes low key, sometimes throbbing, and sometimes sharp. I have a physical therapy appt scheduled for the 18th. My hips feel loose too, and I don't feel like they will support me. Sometimes I can't raise a foot to put my shorts on because one leg won't support me. It's just awkward, getting worse throughout the day. Laying on the side that hurts helps a lot.
Other days its just loose ligaments and I feel like I have sea legs in the night when I get up to pee-often! Did I mention I can't stay awake after 9pm, but going to bed that early means I am more likely to be wide awake between three and five?! That seems to be the baby's favorite time to do acrobatics. Baby is not just kicking, but full body turn overs and huge movements that kick doesn't do justice too. Usually at 5am no less! Dh had his hand on my belly and he jumped and shouted out the movements were so large. Too funny! It no longer matters if dh's hand is in the right spot, the shockwaves from the somersaults can be felt all over :) The baby is over two pounds now and there is no mistaking every movement. I have to say, even at 5am, that is just plain awesome. You can definitely look down and see my stomach changing shape before your eyes. Very surreal.
The thing with the baby being so big now is there seems to be no room for anything else, including food. I am stuck with very small portions often and I still feel like I am full 24/7, only it is the baby making me feel full. Maybe bursting at the seems is more accurate? I think my belly needs a major growth spurt to catch up and give me some breathing (eating) room again. I feel like the baby is even up under my ribs. There is no where else to go until I grow a little more. It's the strangest feeling ever. It is crazy, but I could totally tell when Charlie went head down as the kicks and punches changed position too. I wonder if it will be the same with this baby?
It will be fun to see at the doctor's office what I am measuring. I love how the cm you measure (I forget which way) correspond to the number of weeks you are. With Charlie, I was right on every time and he was a very average sized baby (7 lbs 8 oz). It will be interesting to see. I am in and out so fast and he just tells me I measure "normal." I am less good at asking more questions, etc, this time around since Charlie is usually with me. The baby moving is good reassurance, for sure, but I need to ask when I will have another ultrasound. I want at least one more (or two) before the baby comes. It feels like it has been awhile and I am anxious for a picture, esp since the peanut's main job is adding fat to fill out is wrinkly skin-love it!
Back to symptoms....Heartburn happens often for me, but goes away quickly with Tu.ms or nothing. It is usually when I am not eating enough. And here is the truth about my bladder-can't laugh, can't jump, and some days can't even walk up the stairs. Can I tell you how blessed I am to work from home?! One more thing, new since the first time I posted this.
I find myself doing a lot of nothing. Feeling lazy and hating that part of things. Spending more time than ever on the couch or watching tv...not wanting to walk, or be outside (it is so freaking hot here! It is going to be 100 all week with heat index over 113 some days and where I live it is humid so you can hardly breathe so it isn't safe for Charlie or I to be out anyway). Since dehydration causes early labor I am drinking lots of gatorade and dh and I laugh b/c usually you do that following some sort of physical exertion :)
I will say dh and I got out for a lovely date last Friday-a steak dinner and a comedian. So fun! On Saturday we went to evening mass and then met my family for dinner and ice cream. My dad is doing much better, thank you so much for the prayers. It was a really nice weekend. Until I thought I could clean the house on Sunday. Silly me. Even with dh's help, it was silly. We have a pretty big house (we are fortunate to be in our forever house) and between Charlie and the dog it can be a lot to maintain-picture sticky things stuck to wood floors and covered in dog hair. Nice, eh?
Did I mention I STILL can't find my camera? It stinks! I miss it so much, swore it would show up thinking it was in the house somewhere, now I am not so sure....It must be hanging out with my motivation!
Well that's all folks. Just a random sort of state of the state. My due date is Nov. 7th. November sounds far right? I am sure it does to the random people that ask and then look at me like I really look like I could go any day and not in Nov. I mean, who is thinking Nov is around the corner when it is 100 degrees?! But it is! Less than 90 days away. Not so far at all. And this one could, of course, come early too. Feeling rushed, but able to do less is not a good combo! I did feel guilty that with Charlie, I wanted him to arrive five minutes ago. With this baby, I just keep thinking I need more time before he/she comes. Only because I want to enjoy every second and not have school hanging over my head, and only because I know the baby is safe, happy, healthy, warm, and loved right where it is. But still. I felt a little guilty about this feeling. Until very very recently. You see, as the baby grows and I get more uncomfortable, I realize this is a natural way for the body to say the baby can't stay in here forever. And today (sorry, this post is written over several days so confusing), I saw my friends' 7 week old beautiful twin boys! One was only six pounds and I have to say, gazing into those eyes I thought to hell with school, the baby can come now. :) So, I guess I am moving in the right direction.
Which reminds me, I should really start reading my Bradley book. Yikes! But, the good news is the baby's room is pretty much ready (I got out, washed, and put away everything, etc), so when the camera resurfaces I will get pics up of it and my belly. Maybe I can get a video of Charlie too, he loves to pat my belly and kiss it. He really does love babies and was initiating kissing the new baby's foreheads' today. The truth is I would take these crazy symptoms every day of my life for even just one baby, so please don't get me wrong. I love that sweet boy so much and can't believe we are blessed with another! I know it is nothing we have done personally, and I well aware that it isn't fair that so many women more deserving than I are waiting to conceive their first born. You all are never far from my thoughts and prayers! I have faith the time will come!
A long time ago I asked someone pregnant how they were feeling and they replied "very third trimester-y." I wasn't sure what it meant and don't recall if I was told by her or someone later. But ladies, I am so there.
Not to complain. But to inform. And warn. And, okay, maybe to complain a little? If you are anywhere near the 2nd trimester, enjoy it, ladies. Because right now I have the urge to do more. To clean my house top to bottom, etc etc etc. And my body, well it just won't cooperate. It's large. Yes. I have now gained
Other days its just loose ligaments and I feel like I have sea legs in the night when I get up to pee-often! Did I mention I can't stay awake after 9pm, but going to bed that early means I am more likely to be wide awake between three and five?! That seems to be the baby's favorite time to do acrobatics. Baby is not just kicking, but full body turn overs and huge movements that kick doesn't do justice too. Usually at 5am no less! Dh had his hand on my belly and he jumped and shouted out the movements were so large. Too funny! It no longer matters if dh's hand is in the right spot, the shockwaves from the somersaults can be felt all over :) The baby is over two pounds now and there is no mistaking every movement. I have to say, even at 5am, that is just plain awesome. You can definitely look down and see my stomach changing shape before your eyes. Very surreal.
The thing with the baby being so big now is there seems to be no room for anything else, including food. I am stuck with very small portions often and I still feel like I am full 24/7, only it is the baby making me feel full. Maybe bursting at the seems is more accurate? I think my belly needs a major growth spurt to catch up and give me some breathing (eating) room again. I feel like the baby is even up under my ribs. There is no where else to go until I grow a little more. It's the strangest feeling ever. It is crazy, but I could totally tell when Charlie went head down as the kicks and punches changed position too. I wonder if it will be the same with this baby?
It will be fun to see at the doctor's office what I am measuring. I love how the cm you measure (I forget which way) correspond to the number of weeks you are. With Charlie, I was right on every time and he was a very average sized baby (7 lbs 8 oz). It will be interesting to see. I am in and out so fast and he just tells me I measure "normal." I am less good at asking more questions, etc, this time around since Charlie is usually with me. The baby moving is good reassurance, for sure, but I need to ask when I will have another ultrasound. I want at least one more (or two) before the baby comes. It feels like it has been awhile and I am anxious for a picture, esp since the peanut's main job is adding fat to fill out is wrinkly skin-love it!
Back to symptoms....Heartburn happens often for me, but goes away quickly with Tu.ms or nothing. It is usually when I am not eating enough. And here is the truth about my bladder-can't laugh, can't jump, and some days can't even walk up the stairs. Can I tell you how blessed I am to work from home?! One more thing, new since the first time I posted this.
I find myself doing a lot of nothing. Feeling lazy and hating that part of things. Spending more time than ever on the couch or watching tv...not wanting to walk, or be outside (it is so freaking hot here! It is going to be 100 all week with heat index over 113 some days and where I live it is humid so you can hardly breathe so it isn't safe for Charlie or I to be out anyway). Since dehydration causes early labor I am drinking lots of gatorade and dh and I laugh b/c usually you do that following some sort of physical exertion :)
I will say dh and I got out for a lovely date last Friday-a steak dinner and a comedian. So fun! On Saturday we went to evening mass and then met my family for dinner and ice cream. My dad is doing much better, thank you so much for the prayers. It was a really nice weekend. Until I thought I could clean the house on Sunday. Silly me. Even with dh's help, it was silly. We have a pretty big house (we are fortunate to be in our forever house) and between Charlie and the dog it can be a lot to maintain-picture sticky things stuck to wood floors and covered in dog hair. Nice, eh?
Did I mention I STILL can't find my camera? It stinks! I miss it so much, swore it would show up thinking it was in the house somewhere, now I am not so sure....It must be hanging out with my motivation!
Well that's all folks. Just a random sort of state of the state. My due date is Nov. 7th. November sounds far right? I am sure it does to the random people that ask and then look at me like I really look like I could go any day and not in Nov. I mean, who is thinking Nov is around the corner when it is 100 degrees?! But it is! Less than 90 days away. Not so far at all. And this one could, of course, come early too. Feeling rushed, but able to do less is not a good combo! I did feel guilty that with Charlie, I wanted him to arrive five minutes ago. With this baby, I just keep thinking I need more time before he/she comes. Only because I want to enjoy every second and not have school hanging over my head, and only because I know the baby is safe, happy, healthy, warm, and loved right where it is. But still. I felt a little guilty about this feeling. Until very very recently. You see, as the baby grows and I get more uncomfortable, I realize this is a natural way for the body to say the baby can't stay in here forever. And today (sorry, this post is written over several days so confusing), I saw my friends' 7 week old beautiful twin boys! One was only six pounds and I have to say, gazing into those eyes I thought to hell with school, the baby can come now. :) So, I guess I am moving in the right direction.
Which reminds me, I should really start reading my Bradley book. Yikes! But, the good news is the baby's room is pretty much ready (I got out, washed, and put away everything, etc), so when the camera resurfaces I will get pics up of it and my belly. Maybe I can get a video of Charlie too, he loves to pat my belly and kiss it. He really does love babies and was initiating kissing the new baby's foreheads' today. The truth is I would take these crazy symptoms every day of my life for even just one baby, so please don't get me wrong. I love that sweet boy so much and can't believe we are blessed with another! I know it is nothing we have done personally, and I well aware that it isn't fair that so many women more deserving than I are waiting to conceive their first born. You all are never far from my thoughts and prayers! I have faith the time will come!
8.15.2010
Prayer Buddy Reveal
I was very blessed to "meet" a new (to me) blogger through the summer edition of prayer buddies. It was Suzie Q T Pie from Hope and Trust. If you haven't met her before, go over and check her out because I was missing out. But then I am used to being out of the loop, lol, so I am sure you all have already discovered this amazing gal!
I really enjoyed reading her blog, going back into her archives, and just learning about her so I could pray specifically for her needs. Suzie, I prayed to St. Gerard and also St. Raphael (a personal favorite of mine!) for healing from PCOS and IF in general. I said novenas for you, nightly prayers, daily masses, and also offered up my lovely sciatic pain for you! Lucky girl :) I also prayed about your upcoming move, that you and your dh would find jobs quickly, that you would both have patience living with your mom and stepdad, and that you could keep up your GI diet (I can only imagine how difficult that is!)
I want you to know I will continue to enjoy your blog and will be keeping your intentions in my prayers as well.
I really enjoyed reading her blog, going back into her archives, and just learning about her so I could pray specifically for her needs. Suzie, I prayed to St. Gerard and also St. Raphael (a personal favorite of mine!) for healing from PCOS and IF in general. I said novenas for you, nightly prayers, daily masses, and also offered up my lovely sciatic pain for you! Lucky girl :) I also prayed about your upcoming move, that you and your dh would find jobs quickly, that you would both have patience living with your mom and stepdad, and that you could keep up your GI diet (I can only imagine how difficult that is!)
I want you to know I will continue to enjoy your blog and will be keeping your intentions in my prayers as well.
8.12.2010
My Big Talker!
Charlie has had a language explosion and it is so fun to see I just had to share it with you. I am in love with him being able to tell me so much. He is teething again (ugh), the canines on top so super painful.
He was up in the night (3:30am) two nights ago and we had this hilarious conversation. It went like this (after I gave him teeth meds)- I said "are you cold?" b/c his arms feel cold. "Brr" he replies so I put a long sleeved shirt on him. While doing this he says, "I want a snack." I laugh and say "Okay, you didn't have a great dinner. Just a quick piece of bread and then back to bed." We go to the kitchen. As we walk downstairs, he says "where's daddy?" I say "night night and so is the dog and that is what you are going to do after your bread." We go upstairs with the bread and sit on the floor (he is out of the nursery so no rocking chair, but still in crib so no bed to sit on; this is where we read books at night). He says " I want a story." I say, "its time for night night after your bread; it isn't time for a story. Eat your bread" He proceeds to eat his bread and after every bite makes these hilarious exaggerated "mmm, mmm" sounds like this is the best thing he's ever ate his whole life. Next, he catches a view of a picture from the hopsital on his dresser right after he was born. He says "baby." I say "yes; baby Charlie. He wants you to go night night too." How funny is that?! He has never really talked in the night before and, of course, I find it so fun to know what his little mind is thinking.
He never ceases to crack me up with his observations! Last night I told him it was time to go to bed. Normally he happily goes upstairs. This time he said "No. I want trucks. Play." He even impresses me by not minding! lol (I have an undergrad as speech path and even though I never practiced, I have always encouraged language to avoid frustration and challenging behaviors so I was super impressed he told me instead of throwing a fit. Of course, we still went to bed, but I think I gave him one more minute or something).
He is also loving letters and singing the alphabet. The Lett.er Facto.ry movie by Leap Frog is $10 at Target and such a good one for those around two. It is one of the few movies we watch at home. There is also a fridge magnet game for $20 by them and each time you put the letter in, like a puzzle, it sings a song about what letter it is and what sound it makes (the same song as the video). I think it was a good investment, but you know what started him so thrilled by letters? Super cheapy foam ones that go in the bathtub and stick to the wall! I pulled them out about five new at a time (in order) and he immediately wanted to know their names (as with everything these days). "What's that?" he constantly asks. Now he knows "A, B, C, D, K, O" and a few more I can't think of. He has been taking them to the pool with him all month, even towing them in his dump truck and packing them into his little backpack with his diapers! He loves pointing out all the "o"s while we drive that he sees on signs etc. Brilliant! Thanks for letting me take a minute to brag on my little smartie! Did I mention he is only 22 months!
P.S. Camera is still missing, grrr, but trust me when I tell you I have put on 30 lbs and the baby kicks hard (he/she is 2 lbs now, HUGE!) I am up for an hr or two every night just wide awake with some craziness going on in my belly! :) Dh just slept all night with his hand on my belly and I know he is just smiling in his sleep. We are both amazed by how strong the baby is getting!
He was up in the night (3:30am) two nights ago and we had this hilarious conversation. It went like this (after I gave him teeth meds)- I said "are you cold?" b/c his arms feel cold. "Brr" he replies so I put a long sleeved shirt on him. While doing this he says, "I want a snack." I laugh and say "Okay, you didn't have a great dinner. Just a quick piece of bread and then back to bed." We go to the kitchen. As we walk downstairs, he says "where's daddy?" I say "night night and so is the dog and that is what you are going to do after your bread." We go upstairs with the bread and sit on the floor (he is out of the nursery so no rocking chair, but still in crib so no bed to sit on; this is where we read books at night). He says " I want a story." I say, "its time for night night after your bread; it isn't time for a story. Eat your bread" He proceeds to eat his bread and after every bite makes these hilarious exaggerated "mmm, mmm" sounds like this is the best thing he's ever ate his whole life. Next, he catches a view of a picture from the hopsital on his dresser right after he was born. He says "baby." I say "yes; baby Charlie. He wants you to go night night too." How funny is that?! He has never really talked in the night before and, of course, I find it so fun to know what his little mind is thinking.
He never ceases to crack me up with his observations! Last night I told him it was time to go to bed. Normally he happily goes upstairs. This time he said "No. I want trucks. Play." He even impresses me by not minding! lol (I have an undergrad as speech path and even though I never practiced, I have always encouraged language to avoid frustration and challenging behaviors so I was super impressed he told me instead of throwing a fit. Of course, we still went to bed, but I think I gave him one more minute or something).
He is also loving letters and singing the alphabet. The Lett.er Facto.ry movie by Leap Frog is $10 at Target and such a good one for those around two. It is one of the few movies we watch at home. There is also a fridge magnet game for $20 by them and each time you put the letter in, like a puzzle, it sings a song about what letter it is and what sound it makes (the same song as the video). I think it was a good investment, but you know what started him so thrilled by letters? Super cheapy foam ones that go in the bathtub and stick to the wall! I pulled them out about five new at a time (in order) and he immediately wanted to know their names (as with everything these days). "What's that?" he constantly asks. Now he knows "A, B, C, D, K, O" and a few more I can't think of. He has been taking them to the pool with him all month, even towing them in his dump truck and packing them into his little backpack with his diapers! He loves pointing out all the "o"s while we drive that he sees on signs etc. Brilliant! Thanks for letting me take a minute to brag on my little smartie! Did I mention he is only 22 months!
P.S. Camera is still missing, grrr, but trust me when I tell you I have put on 30 lbs and the baby kicks hard (he/she is 2 lbs now, HUGE!) I am up for an hr or two every night just wide awake with some craziness going on in my belly! :) Dh just slept all night with his hand on my belly and I know he is just smiling in his sleep. We are both amazed by how strong the baby is getting!
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